Individuation, or the process through which we develop a unique self, begins in childhood. To individuate successfully, children need room to explore, learn, and express their needs and desires. If our attempts at self-expression earn only criticism or punishment from parents, friends, or anyone else, we might respond by ignoring our internal sense of self. It may seem safer and more beneficial to reshape ourselves into someone more easily accepted.
You’re not perfect, nor should you be, but you are still amazing! Understanding yourself makes it easier to address the aspects you may perhaps feel dissatisfied with. Lacking a clearly defined sense of self often makes it difficult to know exactly what you want, as opposed to what others want from you. This in turn can lead to a profound sense of discontent as you struggle to identify the source of your unhappiness, even when there is nothing obviously wrong.
Knowing who you are, coupled with a freedom to express yourself, allows you to live with purpose, make better choices in life, develop satisfying relationships, improve self-worth, and develop an acceptance of the entire self. All these can contribute to your overall emotional and physical health.
When you tell your story it’s
important to tear out all the pages
that were written by someone else
until you get to the first page that
was written by you
